All Relationships Have a Place in the Garden

Friends are "annuals" that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a "perennial" that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There's a place in the garden for both of them.  – Erma Bombeck

Relatives are the family God picks for us and friends are the family we pick for ourselves.  God infuses people together as a family and uses their love, personalities, differences, and even dysfunction to grow our spirits and teach us how to love unconditionally.  We choose our friends because they are they share the same interests we do, encourage us, and fulfill the needs that others neglect.   Both types of family walk with us and help us find our way on our journey through life.

I thought I would share something my brother wrote about his sisters that illustrates so well how God grows our spirits and unfolds His plan for the people in our lives...

“When I was little, I wondered, what are sisters for?  They were always in the bathroom, doing God knows what, and when they finally got out of the bathroom it was impossible to get anywhere because of all the make-up and hair spray.  I use to think that sisters were put on this earth just to torture me.  I could not go five minutes without being told what to do or what to say.  As time went on I forgot the question, “What are sisters for?”  It was several years later when I realized the answer to my childhood problem.  Sisters were made by God to teach me what my parents might have forgotten to tell me; to let me know that I am special because I am myself.  My sisters taught me to smile when I was sad and to cry when I was happy.  My sisters are always there to correct my mistakes even before I make them.  There are many more answers to my question, but one stands above all others, “Who else is going to spoil me?”

I often question some relationships in my life because they can be truly exhausting or even downright heartbreaking.  But I trust in God’s plan; I trust that each and every person He planted into my life was deliberate and that if I do my part and cultivate unconditional love and forgiveness, the end result will be a harvest of understanding and enlightenment…that of all that we experience in life, love is all that matters.

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.”  1 Corinthians 13:1 - NIV

Murder in the Garden

“It's the circle of life, and it moves us all through despair and hope, through faith and love.”  Rafiki

It was a hot and humid morning…the air was thick and I could feel something amiss and as I walked through the garden I noticed my little dog Hillary sniffing out what I soon realized was a crime scene.  There it was...a plethora of feathers spread out like the impact site of a meteor!  I felt the hairs stand up on the back of my neck as I walked closer to investigate.  It must have been that spineless cat next door that sneaks over to rummage around and stalk little birds that play innocently in the garden.  The criminal is quite evasive, but the evidence is overwhelming…

It amazes me that domesticated cats, so well-fed, in fact, some so fat they can barely walk, are still excellent hunters. The family tree of the cat family can be traced back more than 40 million years.  At one time all cats were wild and now they still use the same methods as that of their ancestors.   After stalking their prey, they wait quietly and patiently for the right moment before pouncing and making a kill. They chase birds, rodents, and occasionally rabbits, although I haven’t seen any rabbits in the garden lately, thank goodness.

Ten interesting facts about cats (http://facts.randomhistory.com/interesting-facts-about-cats.html):

• A group of cats is called a “clowder.”
• A female cat is called a queen or a molly.
• Approximately 40,000 people are bitten by cats in the U.S. annually.
• According to Hebrew legend, Noah prayed to God for help protecting all the food he stored on the ark from being eaten by rats. In reply, God made the lion sneeze, and out popped a cat.
• A cat rubs against people not only to be affectionate but also to mark out its territory with scent glands around its face. The tail area and paws also carry the cat’s scent.
• In 1888, more than 300,000 mummified cats were found an Egyptian cemetery. They were stripped of their wrappings and carted off to be used by farmers in England and the U.S. for fertilizer.
• While many parts of Europe and North America consider the black cat a sign of bad luck, in Britain and Australia, black cats are considered lucky.
• Cats hate the water because their fur does not insulate well when it’s wet.
• A cat almost never meows at another cat, mostly just humans. Cats typically will spit, purr, and hiss at other cats.
• A cat’s nose pad is ridged with a unique pattern, just like the fingerprint of a human.

My favorite is the Hebrew legend!  God does have a sense of humor, so I can really appreciate that one.  God’s imagination in all creation stuns me.  Everything he makes is so interesting, intricate, and beautiful.  Evidence of His glory can be seen in every living thing, even the mischievous little cats that commit murder in my garden.  The garden is such a great example of the circle of life.  Plants, insects, reptiles, and animals are born, grow, live, and die in the beauty that surrounds us, and He cares about everything He creates, from the smallest of insects to the largest of animals.  If He cares so much for those creatures, do you not know how much He must care for you?  He promises us in His word that He knew us before we were even born, in fact before He created the world.  He thought about us then.  He counts every hair on our head and collects all of our tears.  If that isn’t love, man I don’t know what is.  Count me in God; I want all of that love I can get!  It is free…it’s a gift and we don’t have to earn it.  It is simple.  All we have to do is believe in Jesus Christ and pass that love on to others.  Elementary my dear Watson!

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." – Jeremiah 1:5

“Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” – Luke 12:7

“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” – Psalm 56:8

A Fourth Sister Faces East

"Turn your face to the sun and the shadows follow behind you."  ~ Maori Proverb

This morning as I drove a different road to the entrance of the college where I work, I was greeted by a reception line of sunflowers.  They stood at attention facing the east and formed a wall between the road and the field behind.  My time at the college has come full circle; I will be pursuing another dream soon and I told my co-worker that one thing I will really miss is driving in every morning and seeing each new surprise that God has for me in the landscape that surrounds.  I started reading about sunflowers and found out that it is a myth that their faces follow the sun.  The article I read said the mature heads typically face the east (which I witnessed this morning) and do not move.  The leaves and buds of young sunflowers do exhibit a process called heliotropism (sun turning) and their orientation changes from east to west during the course of a day.  The movements become a circadian response and when plants are rotated 180 degrees, the old response pattern is still followed for a few days, with leaf orientation changing from west to east instead.  The leaf and flower head bud phototropism occurs while the leaf petioles and stems are still actively growing, but once mature, the movements stop. These movements involve the petioles bending or twisting during the day then unbending or untwisting at night.(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunflower). 

It is believed that sunflowers were domesticated first in present day Mexico.  Traditionally, several Native American groups planted sunflowers on the north edges of their gardens as a "fourth sister" to the better known three sisters combination of corn, beans, and squash.  The modern day concept of the "Three Sisters" is referred to as companion planting.  Companion plants are where two or more different type plants are planted in close proximity to each other and this way the plants benefits each other in some way.  In modern times, sunflowers are grown and harvested for their seeds that are sold as snack foods and processed for cooking oil, among other uses.

I was somewhat disappointed with this sunflower news because I have always loved the idea that sunflower faces followed the sun.  God always has a lesson for me with His surprises.  He gave me the impression that we are very much like the sunflowers in that while we are young and growing in our faith, we search for the “Son” (Jesus) in many different directions.  We twist and turn and run to and fro to find the light of truth.  As we mature and become more stable in our faith, we realize that all we have to do is believe, stand strong, bear fruit (fruits of the Spirit), and watch for our Savior. 

So, like the sunflower, let us stand strong, stay vigilant, and keep our faces to the East, for that is where the Son of Man will return to collect His own.

"For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be." —Matthew 24:27

Went To a Garden Party

“I went to a garden party to reminisce with my old friends...” – Ricky Nelson

Garden Party:  a party of people assembled for social interaction out of doors.

Friend:  “I’ve never been to a garden party”.

Me:  “Me either, so I just decided to have one!”

I love gardens and I love entertaining, so a garden party was in order.   I began dreaming of a party straight from the pages of Martha Stewart‘s Living Magazine and started planning accordingly.  Unfortunately I don’t have Martha’s budget, so I had to “tweak” a few things, but it was lovely none-the-less. 

I give my mother much credit for my love of all things garden.  As I have written in the past, her gardens were the envy of the neighborhood and the passion she put into planting her gardens I found rooted in my heart years and years later.  Memories of her gardens haunt the corners and pathways of my own.

 She was there with me when I watered the garden first thing that morning, as I placed her dishware on my table, as my hands prepared the food and drinks, and when I broke the beautiful glass pitcher that was once hers and felt the loss, I imagined her wrapping her arms around me and whispering “it’s OK honey, I understand”, as I know she would have.  She was as much a part of that garden party as any one person who was there.

My mother is gone now, and when Mother’s Day comes to pass this Sunday, I will feel a real void in the day.  It has been almost two years…she died on a Saturday in August and not a day has gone by that I don’t miss her, long for her love, and wish I had done some things differently.  The good news is that I know, with all my heart, that her love lives on.  I am certain that I will see her again and it will be in a perfect place… at the perfect time… for all eternity.  And now when I feel her loss, God wraps His loving arms around me and whispers “it’s OK honey, I understand”.

So in the meantime, I strive to go about the business of my Father in Heaven, live life, love others, and have lots and lots of garden parties.

“So I commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun.” – Ecclesiastes 8:15

Amber Waves of Grain

“If a man walks in the woods for love of them half of each day, he is in danger of being regarded as a loafer. But if he spends his days as a speculator, shearing off those woods and making the earth bald before her time, he is deemed an industrious and enterprising citizen”.  - Henry David Thoreau

As I have written about in the past, there are agricultural fields around the college where I work.  On one side of the road that leads to the entrance, a crop of wheat was planted where last year’s corn once grew and I enjoy being a witness to the thousands, perhaps millions of beautiful amber colored stalks that “wave” in the wind.  Some mornings they wave me on into work and on other days I imagine they are waving me on a little further east…

There are colleges, hospitals, apartments, housing additions, restaurants and a multitude of businesses moving in and setting up shop and in the meantime, the beautiful countryside keeps getting pushed further and further east of this particular area.  Some days I long to keep driving, to see what is left and mourn yet another piece of earth that has been plowed over, hardened by cement, and “developed”, all in the name of progress.

There is something to be said for progress.  After all, this is America, the land of opportunity,  but is no longer America, the beautiful.  It has become a land littered with empty strip malls, abandoned homes, and endless construction.  It brings to mind the story of The Winchester House.  Sarah Winchester, who lost her husband and child and was told by a psychic that there was a curse on the family because of the terrible weapon created by the Winchester family, kept building onto her home after moving to California, so that she could “control the spirits who came to the house for evil purposes”.  (The Winchester story can be found at http://www.prairieghosts.com/winchester.html).  I wonder if we keep building and building, in spite of being on the verge of economic collapse, in order to shroud ourselves in denial about the evil consequences of greed and materialism that lurk around, seeking to destroy…

Oh how I long for a simpler time.  A time when families sat together on the front porch to watch the sunset or worked together in the garden, a time when everyone knew their neighbors, a time when grocery store owners and bank tellers knew you by name, a time when people stayed married and taught their children to respect authority, elders, and each other, a time when a man’s word was as good as gold, and a time when people worshiped God; not youth, beauty, or fame.

It saddens me to think that when my grandchildren grow up they probably will not even know what a field of wheat looks like.  I wonder if they will know that if you put about 50 of the grains in your mouth and chew a while it will become chewing gum…old farmers chewing gum.  That was something my mother showed me, perhaps it is time for me to pass it along.

“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.  Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings”.  1 Peter 5:8-9